So unfair

“People are being so unfair. Especially, the so called Liberals.”

“First they ask me for my tax records. Why would anyone do that? How does my tax record---which is beautiful, by the way---prevent me from ruining, I mean running, this country and make it great again? Some days, I feel like, what the hell, let them see my tax records. Let them see how brilliant I am. See how I am capable of making millions of dollars of income disappear. For a thinking citizen, this would be a proof of what I can do with our deficit, which is totally disgusting, by the way. I can easily make it disappear too!”

“Second they ask for my health records. Didn’t they see the glowing report produced by my doctor, one of the best in the country? Didn’t it say that I would be the healthiest person ever to be elected to the office of presidency? Why don’t they believe it? I should have disclosed what else he mentioned. He said that my digestive system is so good that I produce far above average shit. He compared that to what a bull generally produces.”

“Third, they keep hammering me whenever I say nice things about my daughter. Just look at her. How can you blame me if I say that I would date her if she were not my daughter? How can that be incest? I bet Bill Clinton would have said the same thing if his daughter looked like mine, instead of like a dog.”

“Talking about women who look like dogs, think of Hillary. Like all women, she is stupid. She also looks like shit and aggressive as hell. She calls me names.  Compared to her, just look at my wife. She is obedient, like women should be, and a knock out. Hell, there are nude pictures of her on the web. Do you find any of the Clinton women? Who would look at them?”

“They say I hate Mexicans. Nothing can be farther from truth. I have this hideout in Mexico, the most beautiful hideout, believe me, and the Mexican servants there are so nice. My wife has never been raped over there. They also listen to whatever I say. They are clean, like you and me, not dirty. They even eat civilized food like hamburgers, not some crappy tacos. Unfortunately, they all want to come here. I have seen millions of them pouring in everyday. With my own eyes. If I do not build the wall, it will be goodbye America.”

“Also, we have millions of Islamist terrorists pouring in, everyday. They are ready to plunge our country into chaos. They are all Muslims. If we don't stop them, we will become Saudi America with Sharia Law. They are not like you and me. I admit, our guys also go on a rampage and kill a few people now and then. But Muslims, they kill hundreds everyday; it is just not reported by the Liberal media. Believe me. I have seen with my own eyes.”

“It is so unfair that people say bad things about me. They just do not understand.”

Old age and Epicurus

I came across an interesting book while browsing in Harvard Coop bookstore in Cambridge, MA. Titled, “Travels with Epicurus,” it contains ruminations of an elderly writer, Daniel Klein, as he tries to find what makes old age fulfilling. To do so, he carried a bunch of books written by philosophers, primarily Greek, and went to Hydra, a Greek island. There he observed how the elderly on that island enjoy their old age, focusing on one old guy, Tasso, and his friends.

The book is filled with interesting philosophies and observations on old age. He quotes Epicurus a lot (and hence the title of the book). Epicurus is the one who said, “Best possible life one could live is a happy one, a life filled with pleasure.” He further observes, “The old age is pinnacle of life, as good as it gets.”

This observation is along the same line as what most of us have experienced, that the “young” old age is when you have everything, time, health, wealth, and freedom from duties (unless you have elderly parents to take care of). I wrote a Blog Post on the subject in January 2015.

Further, Epicurus says, “It is not the young man who should be considered fortunate but the old man who has lived well, because the young man in his prime wanders much by chance, vacillating in his belief, while the old man has docked in the harbor, having safeguarded his true happiness.”

As a counter to that “old man with his ship docked in the harbor,” Klein coins a term “forever young” to describe elderly who are trying to remain young forever, by making bucket lists and trying to run around with as much vigor as when they were young. According to him, “Many forever youngsters are driven by the frustration of not having fully achieved the goals they dreamed of attaining when they were younger; they see their final years as a last chance to grab some elusive brass ring.”

He elaborates on his disdain for a bucket list, “New experiences and new things couldn’t possibly be boring, could they? Well apparently they often could. Newness itself gets old. At the twelfth place to see before dying, viewing exotic terrain gets to be old hat---you’ve already done exotic eleven times.”

So what needs to be done? Epicurus says, “Scale down and enjoy the leisurely pleasures of old age.” That is what the Greek person that Klein is observing, Tasso, is doing. He spends his days enjoying company of his friends sitting at a tavern.

“Tasso is enjoying his companions without wanting anything from them. He simply wants his friend to be with him. He wants him to share conversation, laughter, and, most importantly, silence. Epicureans considered communal silence a hallmark of true friendship.” This is such an important point. I too have observed that when your friendship with someone reaches certain level, there is no need to constantly converse.

Another thing that Klein suggests is to feel free to complain and discuss your problems with your friends, health in particular. “If we do not let it all hang out in front of our friends, we are cheating ourselves out of one of old person’s best palliatives.” I have observed this to be true. After certain age, there is no need for us to put up a façade that we are a picture of perfect health. We all have issues, and talking about them makes us feel good. 

Klein observes that, “Accumulated experience is what an old person has in abundance. The trick is to slow down enough that this accumulated experience can be contemplated and even, hopefully, savored.” That plus using your mind to pursue philosophical matter is what he recommends. “Leaving the world of commerce and politics behind, we are free to focus our brainpower on other matters, often more intimate and philosophical matters.”

This, according to Klein, is a “fulfilled” old age, as different from “forever young” old age. If we do not follow on his advise, “We proceed directly from the “forever young” stage of life to old old age, missing forever the chance at being a fulfilled old man docked in harbor, having safeguarded his true happiness. We lose out on the pinnacle of life, as per Epicurus.”

Klein has choice words for the old old age. “Senility and incontinence are what we have to look forward to in old old age. The medical science, at great expense, has largely given us extended years of decrepitude. ‘Alive is the new dead.’ Old old age stinks. It is difficult to see geriatric depression as a mental disorder; it seems more like an authentic and fitting response. The entire prospect of gradually and inevitably falling apart, with death as the only possible relief, not only fills me with terror, it overwhelms me with anger.”

So should one live in despair before the inevitable happens and we enter old old age? According to Klein, a middle path is what is required. “Perhaps authentic old age can consist of neither the breathless ambition of the forever youngster nor unremitting despair, but something meaningful in itself.”

Klein spends time in describing Hindu and Buddhist philosophies as quite relevant to finding meaning. “Zen Buddhism teaches mindfulness as the path to enlightenment –full consciousness, a continuous, clear awareness of the present moment.”

Poet William Blake beautifully describes living in the present moment:

“He who binds to himself a joy

Does he winged life destroy

But he who kisses the joy as it flies

Lives in Eternity’s sunrise.” 

This is a good book to read if for nothing else to learn what wise folks say about becoming old. I have personally struggled with the question with no clear answer. In one of my earlier Posts, “The Stage of Just Living” of February 2016, I made similar observations as those of Epicurus while indicating the difficulties in following that advice. On the other hand, I have followed “forever young” type of life in my retirement, and old age. I would frankly be bored after a few days of living the life that Tasso is living. Perhaps, there is an age before old old age sets in but after I get tired of bucket lists and search for new experiences. That’s when it would be good to follow advice of the philosophers of the past. 

Terrorism

When 9/11 happened, we were stunned by how could a small band of people bring an entire nation to its knees. Not only those attacks killed more than 3,000 Americans but it also ended up costing vast sums of money.  This was the opening move of a different type of war.

As we all know, in retrospection, that these tragedy could have been prevented. The perpetrators had taken training in how to fly commercial jetliners. The cabins of the airplanes were not locked so anyone with bad intentions could have walked in. The effectiveness of security apparatus was not up to the par. The murders had left enough clues that they could have been caught prior to committing their heinous acts.

In the ensuing years, steps have been taken to prevent such tragedies. The airport security has been beefed up, sophisticated databases have created of suspected terrorists, and their movements and conversations are routinely monitored to identify potential plans being hatched. Besides, cockpit doors are now locked preventing hijacking of an airplane.

In response, the terrorist changed their methods. The attacks in San Bernardino and Orlando were surprising because otherwise ordinary people, not on anyone’s terror lists, perpetrated them. Instead of sending men with bad intentions, they just converted local folks to commit crimes.

These tragedies could not have been stopped by tighter law enforcement. There are lots of people being tracked by our fine folks at Homeland Security and local law enforcement agencies. However, it is almost impossible to find needles in haystack, or even worse, as the head of FBI said, identify hay that might become a needle.

Preventing all Muslims from entering our country is such an asinine idea that it is not even worth discussing. Besides being unconstitutional and so very un-American, such a move would not have caught these murderers…they were American citizens, not foreign nationals.

The only thing that can be done to prevent these terrorist acts, or at least their severity, is to make it impossible for civilians to lay their hands on assault rifles. Such a law is long over due, and would have passed if not blocked by our homegrown coconspirators, those fine folks at NRA.

The reverse argument, to let everyone have guns is as stupid as banning all Muslims. One would not be able to separate good guys from bad guys when the shooting starts and there would be a total Western movie style shoot out, resulting in an even larger tragedy.

Now, with the terrorist act in Nice, we are confronted with even more challenging environment in which a radicalized terrorist used his truck as a weapon. What can be done? You cannot ban trucks. Perhaps you can install temporary truck barriers whenever a group of folks are going to gather on streets. However, how strong will the barrier need to be to stop a massive truck at full speed? How feasible would it be to install such barriers every time a group wants to congregate?

I think the only option at this stage is to prevent ordinary folks from becoming radical. This process of radicalization does not seem to require personal contacts, say at places of worship or travel to hotbed countries. If it did, it would be relatively easy to monitor.

Radicalization is done largely through the Internet. As I understand, there are huge numbers of videotapes and websites available on-line for the disenfranchised person to tap into to reinforce his/her budding hatred toward the Western way of life. We have to strangle that channel hard.

I am sure that Homeland Security is doing the best it can but they are probably stymied by our desire for privacy. One of my ex-colleagues, working in the defense industry tells me that Ed Snowden, the traitor, gravely damaged our ability to listen in. We have to give permission to people we trust for keeping us safe, so that they are able to go into the entire Web, the part we see and part that is considered “dark,” and shutdown every source of radicalizing material available on-line.

I am reminded of a science fiction movie, “Invasion of Body Snatchers,” in which the aliens try to conquer earth by secretly converting ordinary citizens into aliens, with no change in outward appearance. This is what is happening now. The only way to make a difference is to deny distribution channels to the “aliens” even if it means invading our privacy.

We cannot go on living like this, in constant fear of our friends and neighbors getting infected and becoming rabid murders.

Mr. Trump's nightmare

I am sitting in the balcony of our daughter’s apartment in Kensington, Brooklyn, watching the world go by. It is Sunday and a threat of rain is in the air.

There is a party for a young Jewish girl in a house in front. A pony is called to give rides to a number of two year olds. The family is all there...old grandpa with his yarmulke, middle-aged people, some youngsters. The birthday girl is frightened of her pony ride and wails.

Next door, children of a Hasidic family are out riding their bikes and so are the neighborhood Bangladeshi kids. The neighborhood is quite alive; the promised rain has not yet materialized.

We go for shopping in a Bangladeshi supermarket. It is filled with Muslims from all different parts of the world. "Inshalla" and "Khuda Hafiz" are the words that we hear. The storekeeper is very polite and helps us navigate through the intricacies of what dates to buy…Saudi Arabian or Kuwaiti.

Then we take a walk on Fort Hamilton Parkway. The neighborhood changes. Now there are Mexicans and Central Americans. We enter an area where one can buy food from Honduras and Mexican tacos. Just like that English gives way to Spanish.

Clusters of Hasidic families, each with number of children all dressed in the same way, are heading toward a Park. The children look cute with their long braided sideburns. They speak Yiddish.  

We come back. It starts raining. We sit in the balcony sipping Japanese Sapporo beer. A Chinese woman in front house comes out briefly to throw garbage. A Bengali man comes out in his lungi and ganji, checking the rain pouring down. The Hasidic kids rush back, throwing their bicycles on the ground. An Indian father runs with his baby in a stroller.

Our daughter’s landlord Abdul comes back home and says hello to us. It is Ramadan and they will not eat until moonrise. The dates my wife has purchased from the Bangladeshi store are meant for them, as that's what they like to eat when they break their daily fast.

This is the America of our dream, where we all live peacefully. It does not matter who you are or what religion you follow. It is a fascinating tapestry of folks like us who have worked hard to escape poverty or persecution. We make this country vibrant and prosperous. There is no "us" and "them".

This is Mr. Trump's nightmare.

An unnatural stage of life

Compared to our genetically similar ancestors we live a long life.

“Chimpanzees and great apes are genetically similar to humans, yet they rarely live for more than 50 years. Although the average human lifespan has doubled in the last 200 years — due largely to decreased infant mortality related to advances in diet, environment and medicine — even without these improvements, people living in high mortality hunter-forager lifestyles still have twice the life expectancy at birth as wild chimpanzees do.”  (Ref. Live Science, Dec. 15, 2009)

This is a real bonus, because as far as nature is concerned, we have done our work as soon as we have given birth to children and brought them up. The “selfish genes” do not need us around once the continuation of their lineage is assured.

Of the pleasures we get in these bonus years, the greatest one, I am told, is to be able to enjoy our grandchildren.   We humans have the unique opportunity to do so. I do not believe too many apes live to see their grandchildren let alone enjoy their early years. For us, it is it is a very common experience.

We are going to find that out. A few days ago, our daughter gave birth to a baby girl and suddenly we are in that next stage of life, the “unnatural” one.

The first part of this stage allows you to re-live the experience when your own children were born. The high level of anticipation when the news is announced is mixed with anxiety, just as it was earlier. This is followed by utter delight when the child comes out looking normal. The fact that a new human being has emerged from almost nothing still feels like a miracle even for a non-believer. The gaze of the child when he/she looks at you for the first time is thrilling even this time around.

Of course, not everything is the same. This time you know that you have the luxury of skimming off the best part of the child rearing experience. While the poor parents bear the brunt of sleepless nights and constant worries as the child progresses through various stages of life, you participate as you wish or as you are needed. You could get away with being the indulgent adult for you grandchild even as the parents take over the responsibility of drawing lines.

There are other ways the experience is not the same. When I was born, my grandfather sent a postcard informing my father of birth. My mother had gone to her parents’ house for delivery while my father had stayed back. When our own children were born, we used telephones to inform all our relatives and I was allowed to be in the delivery room, unlike my father when I was born. When our granddaughter was born, the entire media spectrum was utilized to inform relatives and friends, far and near. Within seconds everyone became aware of the wonderful news and saw what the baby looks like. Videos were taken and Skype was used to bring along the other grandma (in England) participate in the experience.

There are now Apps available for the new parents navigate through the maze of parenting. Anything that the baby or the mother needs can now be instantly ordered for the same day, or next day, delivery.

The baby industry has progressed to the new level from the days when we were raising our children more than three decades ago. The number of options available, say in diapers, makes your mind reel. You end up coming out of the store wondering if the diaper you bought has the right type of “soiled diaper” indicator. In our times the options were few and smell was the only indicator.

The car seat is another story. The modern ones would make an astronaut proud. They are designed to protect the child in every type of car accident, which is good, but their massive and complicated appearance scares the crap out of a new child exploring the world around her. It took us ten minutes to figure out how to unlock the mobile upper portion of the car seat from the fixed lower portion….and I am an engineer.

We would have missed all these experiences if the nature had not allowed us to live beyond our useful period. If the selfish genes had refused to yield, we would be gone by now. 

If that was the case, who would our granddaughter have gone to buy her a candy (or more likely an infant version of iPhone) when the parents would not?