Wednesday, November 1, 2017

NRA's response

We are grieving the loss of life in Nevada. Some of the folks who lost their lives were NRA members, who will be missed (as the end of the year approaches and we don’t get their dues).

This tragedy would not have happened if people listen to us. As we said, “The only way to stop a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun.” The folks (idiots) attending the concert were not carrying guns. Perhaps they were even prevented from carrying guns.

So, we propose that the government pass several legislations to prevent such events from happening again (and making our supporters, the gun manufacturers, wealthier).

First, we will insert an important question that every gun purchaser will have to answer. “Are you a good guy or a bad guy?” If he says, “bad guy”---bam, no gun for him. This is our way of ensuring responsible gun ownership. (We are so clever.)

Second, every concertgoer should be made to carry a gun. If they don’t have a gun, the management will have to loan them one ($). They need to be high caliber automatic weapons ($$$$). Only then can a shooter with a powerful of weapon be stopped.

Just imagine if such legislation were in effect, all the concertgoers in Las Vegas would have opened fire at the hotel where the shooter was located. At least one of them would have stopped him (if that means bystanders and other guests in hotel getting shot, too bad--- just collateral damage).

Third, we are proposing that bazookas be made legal. Just imagine all these bazookas pointing toward the hotel and firing. The shooter would have definitely been hit (the bazooka manufacturers need to diversify their market from just supplying to the military).

Fourth, in these days and age, we have modern technology. A drone can be pretty effective at stopping a shooter. Our military has proven their effectiveness in wars in Afghanistan and Iraq. Just imagine a drone circling with hellfire missiles above the concert. The shooter would have been vaporized when a hellfire hits him (Yes, probably the hotel would have vaporized too, but that is collateral damage. The drone and hellfire missile manufacturers are also looking for diversification).

We are going to appeal to your congressmen to make these legislative changes (should be easy, most are in our pockets. If not we can buy a few more. We have money).

Don’t forget, we are the protector of the second amendment. Without us, you would not have the right to carry assault weapons, which you richly deserve (and our gun manufacturers would have been poorer).


Note: For those not familiar with NRA, it is the National Rifle Association, a powerful gun lobby that believes in not giving an inch on regulating purchase and ownership of guns in USA. Thanks to them and their stranglehold on the lawmakers, US has a higher incidence of guns violence per capita than any other developed country…by far.