It was the dead of night and yet the Iqaluit airport in the remote
Canadian province of Nunavut was humming with activities. Airplanes after
airplanes were landing creating chaos for the immigration authorities. Hundreds
of people from all different countries were pouring in---all in absolute
secrecy.
The visitors took pains to hide their identities, because
many were quite famous and they did not want their presence in this far corner
to be revealed to the world. Those curious enough to ask them who they were got
a curt reply. “We are here for a convention of rose growers.”
In reality, they were scientists and the real purpose of
their visit was quite sinister.
They had travelled to this remote area, where there would be
few watchful eyes, for one reason---to create a hoax of such magnitude that it would
blow your imagination. They wanted to
fabricate a story that the world was going to suffer from a major climate
change because of our actions, and unless something was done, the consequences
would be catastrophic.
They were pretty sure that this hoax would crate a major
upsurge in the funding they received, thus setting them up for life. The only
thing was---all this had to be done in secrecy. If the cover were to be blown,
that would be the end of their careers.
The venue for the gathering was carefully chosen. It was
near the airport, so as to prevent the scientists from roaming around and
creating suspicion. A tent city was erected, covered in camouflage material.
This way, the prying eye of satellites would be fooled.
The hoax convention began with an oath to keep all this
absolutely quiet. Even spouses would not be informed of what they were planning
to do. Nobody outside this small group of 10,000 well-disciplined scientists
would be allowed in the secret, and a leak would be contained by any means
possible. A secret handshake was
established to ensure each person knew if the other person was in the secret or
not.
Details of how the hoax would be perpetrated were
revealed. The temperature measuring
devices around the world would be tempered so that they show rising
temperatures. The measurements of Carbon
Dioxide concentration in the atmosphere would be similarly inflated. Computer
models would be created to show what a dire state our earth is in. Several
medial channels and scientific magazines will be bribed to run fake stories.
Prominent politicians like Al Gore would be bought off so he becomes the spokes
person for the hoax.
Concern was expressed in terms of the vigilant people of Fox
channel and how they could blow the cover. Also, several extremely bright
people of the Republican Party, such as Jim Inhofe, were listed as those to be
feared. Unless the scientists were careful, these people would know something
was wrong.
Determined to make this a success, scientists filed out of
the tent city and went back to the airport for their flights home.
And
thus The Great Hoax was born.
PS: The hoax had a good run. For several years ordinary
folks were petrified by what was coming. Fortunately, earth cooperated and
people could feel something was wrong even without the scientists having to use
false data. However, all this came to an end. As they feared, the Republicans,
led by Inhofe, found out about the hoax. He came to his conclusion using
brilliant logic about god and why would he let us humans alter climate. Fox News
played its role in spreading the truth. The 10,000 scientists were shamed
beyond belief. Their research funding dried up and they were subjected to witch
trials, which were reinstated as a way to prevent future hoaxes.
